On the Road Again
by NoMoreYaoiHere
Summary: Mello, L, Near, Matt, & Light are all on a road trip and break down. This is inspired by a sum what actual happening.
1. Chapter 1

**My school's Spring break was this past week and I traveled 3 hours to a town that is not around mine. Well, on the way back we had car troubles and I thought, 'What if L, Light, Matt, Near, and Mello were going to Atlanta from Birmingham and broke down?' So here is what I think would happen.**

_**OOC & CRACK!!! YAOI!!! (B/N- Yay, crack!!)**_

_**Disclaimer- If I owned DN L, Mello, and Matt would not have died and Matt would have been it more.**_

_**Matt's POV**_

"Why must we go to Birmingham? Alabama is full of nothing but insest and country music," Mello complained.

"No it isn't. It is no different from Atlanta," Light said.

"The only difference is that Atlanta is in Georgia and Birmingham is in Alabama," Near said. He is such a friggin prick.

"Mello is probably just pissed 'cause we didn't want to go see a drag show," I said.

"If I wasn't driving…" he threatened.

"He is just jealous. He wants all of your atten-" L went to say but was cut off by Mello yelling cuss words in Russian.

-_Mello yelling the equivalent of fuck, shit, and damn_-

"What the hell is wrong with you?" I asked, looking up from my iPod touch. He pulled the car over to the side of the road.

"The _**fucking**_ car just _**fucking**_broke down and we are in the middle of _**fucking **_nowhere!" he yelled.

"I was not aware that vehicles could fornicate," Near said.

"Shut the hell up or I will cut your head off with a fucking toothbrush," Mello said. Not thinking, we all had begun talking in English. Since Light was the only one that did not speak the language fluently, his head was about to explode.

"I think Light-kun is about to crawl into a fetal position and start crying if we don't begin to speak in Japanese," L said.

"What is going on? In case you forgot, _I can't speak English_!" he said, yelling the last part.

"Who cares, you're just a stupid teen with a god complex," L grumbled.

"The car broke down and now we are stranded in the middle of nowhere," Near informed Light. "That, and Mello and Matt are appearing to be having marital problems."

"I am not a fucking faggot, you stupid albino!" I yelled. Mello just got out of the car silently and went to check to see what was going on. I flinched. 'Well, it was his idea to keep it a secret,' I thought.

"I'm going to go help him find what is wrong with the car," I said. Getting out meant crawling over either Light or Near's lap, so I chose to climb over Near and "accidently" knee him in the crotch. Fucking know it all.

**Mello's POV **

I know I am the one who suggested that we keep it a secret but he didn't have to go to such great lengths to not make it obvious.

I heard someone walk up next to me and when I turned to face them he kissed me.

"Sorry," he said.

"At least you didn't admit it," I said, trying to make him feel better. I hate to see him upset.

He smiled at me. I love that smile. It is so perfect even though his teeth are slightly yellowed from cigarette smoke. He said, "So what do you think the problem is?"

I sighed with frustration. "I have no idea." We got back in the car and informed the others that we could find nothing.

"Considering the fact that the only cell phone that we had was thrown out the window by Mello approximately an hour ago, we are screwed," L said. We all stared in shock; L _never _used slang. L using slang was about like Matt stop playing a video game. Or Near not playing with robots. Or Light admitting he was gay for L. Or me not wanting chocolate.

"Who are you and what did you do with L?" Matt yelled.

"He is BB!" I yelled jokingly. Near and Light didn't get it because Near got to Wammy's about two years after BB left and Light isn't a Wammy.

While L, Matt, and I were laughing our asses off, Near asked what was so funny.

"BB…is…the only…pers…on…that…could…copy…L…perfect…ly," I explained between bouts of laughter.

"Um, what does BB stand for?" Light asked.

"BB _**stood**_ for Beyond Birthday. He was killed by Kira," L explained.

"Hey, Matt! Can you get wifi?" I randomly yelled remembering that he could get on line with his iTouch.

"No."

"I guess we better start walking," I suggested.

"I think you and Matt should walk and find a phone and Near, Light, and I can stay here and watch the car," L 'suggested'.

"Alright. Come on Matt. And put that fucking thing up."

"That's what she said," he replied.

After we were out of hearing distance I said, "Don't you mean that's what _he_ said?"

"I hate you, Mihael."

"The feeling is mutual Mail," I said.

**What did you think? This is my first fic that I made yaoi out of non-yaoi characters. That the feeling is mutual anyways.**

**PLEASE REVIEW!!!!**

**I apologize for my Beta.**

**YOU +REVIEWS=LOVE LOVE= HAPPINESS HAPPINESS=WORLD PEACE **

**WORLD PEACE=MORE COOKIES**

**So if you think about it. Reviews make the world a better place.**

**OC's in next chapter!!! (B/N- BITCHES!!)**


	2. Chapter 2

**I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaack! Welcome to chapter 2! I was amazed when I checked the hits on this story only three hours after it was published. Thanks to everyone that reviewed!**

**DiScLaImEr~-~ Hell yes I own Death Note! Bring on the lawyers Bitches! Now I am acting like my beta.**

**~~~~Light's POV~~~~**

"Where did Near go?" I asked.

"He is sitting in the car playing with his darts," L responded. He was sitting on the back of the car.

I sat down next to him. It was now or never.

"L."

"Yes?"

"Are you gay?"

"Yes. Well, not at the moment. Why?"

"I mean do you like boys instead of girls?"

**~~~~L's POV~~~~**

"Why are you asking me this Light-kun?" I hope he doesn't know.

"Because," He replied, leaning in to kiss me.

I leaned back when he tried and said, "I am 'gay' but not for you, Light-kun."

"Then who?" he yelled.

"Near."

"You are choosing that little albino asshole over me? Why the hell did you fucking handcuff me to you if you didn't want me?"

"I am not an albino! I was forced to watch my parents brutally murdered and the pigmentation left my hair!" Near yelled, getting out of the car.

"No one asked you!"

"Come on sweetie," I said, putting my arm around Near's shoulders.

**~~~~Matt's POV~~~~**

"How long do you think we would have before they come looking for us?" I asked Mello.

"What do you mean?"

"This," I said, pushing him into the bushes that were on the side of the road. I wanted Mello, NOW!

**So what did you think?**

**Thanks again to all my reviewers except Ka-squiggle.**

**Sorry for the short chapter.**

**Does anybody but my beta even read the author's note?**

**Not-so-friendly-squirrel: actually I'm her second beta and I don't even read these notes unless I'm told to.**


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